The Teen Insider on Being The Middle Child

31 Mar

Know what drives me crazy?
Every time I walk into the room and its dark (or my mom doesn’t have her contacts in) she asks, “Erika?”
Me:...  “No its Brittany”.
Every time my parents call the house and I answer (which I do over any of my sisters) and they say “Erika?… Jordana?”
Me:“No. … Brittany”
EVEN when I call my parents I get, “Erika?” … When obviously there’s caller ID because I’d hope they’d have me in their phone.
Me: ..(Sigh)… “Brittany.”
I am a middle child,  sandwiched between an older sister in college who tells my mom EVERYTHING, every-little-piece-of-her-life (one reason I don’t tell her anything), and my younger sister who is still “the baby” of the family… which means although she has the biggest attitude in the family, she’s still spoiled because she’s the youngest, the last child, the only “baby” left of the family. Then we have me…… the middle child. I’m not given an identity, I’m the child that’s forgotten about.
So where does this leave me? I’m just the junior in high school who is beginning to look at colleges. How does that make me special in anyway? How am I suppose to stand out in my family when I’m just the child thrown in the middle?
Living as the creme in the middle of the cookie sandwich, I always need to find a way to not be called Jordana, Erika or even my dog, Martini (yes my dog is named Martini, I know) And it takes one person to make me stand out- me.
If you were to ask my mom who would be the best child to babysit, hands down she’d tell you Brittany. She’d say, although the older one will bring cookies to make, Brittany is the most responsible.
Jordana has better grades then me- I work harder. Erika gets away with a lot (even with an attitude)- I’m the most reasonable and down to earth.
You see through years of wanting to be unique, I’ve learned who I am; and though many people (myself included), would say they will be like their parents when they grow up, I also want to find ways to be different.
This past summer I went miniature golfing with a friend, it began to rain and the people in front of us were going slowly. My friend became agitated, while I just stood there, not minding the slowness of everyone else- I told him to be patient. He looked at me with a bit of shock and asked why I am so patient, I told him my parents are very impatient and I don’t like it, so I make sure I am patient with everything – its tones everything down, and, I promise,  it doesn’t add on stress to wait.


I’ve also noticed how everyone likes to talk about themselves. I’ll admit I used to be one of those people. Then I took a minute and started listening to what everyone was saying, and this is what I heard; ” I this- I that- I want- I need – I cant- I heard – I did – I,I, I, I,… !!!“. So now, I hold back my “I” in a conversation with people.
I’m more down to earth then a lot of teenagers in my town and I’m definitely more mature.
And although none of this may  change my being called Erika when I answer the phone at home, I’m confident that other people will see all that makes me stand out- because I am unique!… Even if I am the middle child.
A note from the Toy Insider Mom
It’s not easy to read (and post) a blog like this from my daughter and not address it.  However, the deal is that she is here to answer questions and talk about her life of feelings as a teen. That is the deal, and I must respect it.
For those of you with teenagers, you understand how special those small windows of insight into their world are… we don’t get them often (for those with younger children, you’ll get it soon enough).
The Nickelodeon Parent Connect Mantra “We’re not perfect, we’re parents” never rang more true to me. It is important for us as parents (of kids of all ages) to realize that Parenting -every step of the way- is about listening and learning because every child is unique– no matter the birth order. It is something that we as parents recognize from the moment they are born.
* And for the record, I can’t even begin to tell you how much I (and her dad) adore that never forgotten about middle child and what she means to us. I hope she reads this note at the end of her blog!


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